Hey Kathy! I feel like there’s more than one email here. The excitement (new year, ski races, being in the studio). The managerial outcomes/goals feels like something else. What would it be like to stay with the excitement as the vibe for this email? Maybe tell us more about the joy, fear, excitement, danger of the ski racing. What’s it been like…Read More

I agree with Kim. I don’t follow a thread from the ski experiences to your past jobs to what you do now. I think this is a good start and it just needs to be fleshed out more so that A leads to B leads to C.

Ditto. The title makes me feel like the message is going to be about the desire to travel without a plan or explore just because or something like that, or with the skiing, I think of wanderlust as a skier being on the top of a mountain just to go where the snow leads kind of thing, not being in a race where you have to follow a certain path, so…Read More

I agree with what’s been said above. I think there are 2 emails here. I absolutely love how you have tied the vibe of the skiing races to what you experience in a photo shoot. And perhaps that works when you remove the sentence “As a manager it was my job to look at things from everyone’s point of view and help facilitate the outcomes of the g…Read More

I feel like you have two stories, the family coming/skiing etc and the previous financial job and they don’t really relate to each other. And I thought you were heading towards a family photo shoot and then deeper down it sounded like more of a boudoir shoot.

I didn’t really get a sense of what the ‘messy’ is that you are trying to convey, but if…Read More

Agreed with Annett, there are 2 great emails sitting in here! Love the whole family christmas idea and it being messy- use that as a theme for an email on how you help people with the messy- your unique photoshoot is like christmas family time and navigating that. And a second email is about your incredible skills you picked up in the financial…Read More

Hi Kathy! It’s great you went and asked your clients, because they are the ones you want to speak out to, so using their language is helpful. I feel the statement lacks a little bit of emotion, though I could see someone who could be your client (me!). Perhaps just a couple of change in words like embrace their inner beauty, their true essence and…Read More

Kathy – can you put a photo in your profile? It helps us remember who one another is from class. I agree- the more you practice it, the better the info will sound (in that natural way)

love that you went a level deeper!! I can FEEL this from your heart. Please send this and post it so we can talk next steps on Wednesday. Good work!