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    KerstinPeters

    1 year, 9 months ago

    Here is step 2 of the message, the story outline:

    Immigrating to Canada, I had the language skills after a two-year certification as a foreign language correspondent. While I could perform oral business translations, I did not dare to talk to people. During the full-time programme, the goal was perfection. However, we never practiced improvised conversations interactively. I was afraid everyone would think I was stupid because I could not express myself to others with the subtleties of my mother tongue. In the end, I started practicing with our puppy, who was non-judgmental and willing to listen.

    After my children were in school, I started teaching German in one of the local Community Centres. Then, I taught government employees for a private company. I loved teaching. However, I was frustrated about my inability to decide on the course location, number of students, and the teaching materials for the business clients. I spent more time on the road in traffic than teaching. I often had to leave the house in the early morning hours to make it through the traffic in time to the classroom.

    I started working with private clients, which was a lot of fun because I could individualize the learning material according to their needs and interests. I was more flexible and could pick when and where I worked. Unfortunately, I only had a small number of clients and spent a lot of time looking for new clients locally. Plus, situations changed due to travel, illness or family events, and I lost a client without much notice for a prolonged time. I still had to travel to the classes, hauling all my materials.

    I finally realized that I could reach more people virtually. I have all my materials at hand. Plus, I save so much time. No more traffic jams and frantic searches for parking spots! No more worries about the weather! These advantages also benefit the clients who can learn from everywhere in the world.

    I help you learn German playfully and practically to feel confident when you communicate with German speakers, whether in your circle of family and friends or during your vacation. The person across from you doesn’t care if you use the correct word or grammar but how you connect. I invite you to my Learn German Through Art programme to start speaking German now. The purpose of learning a language is to communicate.
    As an immigrant, I know acquiring the language skills for communication is as crucial as knowing a country’s traditions and culture. It is my pleasure to share my knowledge with you to enable you to enjoy German art in its original language, whether you love reading books, watching movies, or listening to music.

    Learning a new language opens so many doors. You will be able to talk to native speakers without a translator and enjoy culture and traditions of a country in the original language.

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    5 Comments
    • Great draft – my recommendation would you warm this up with wayyy more emotion (I know this is hard for some cultures). Here’s a rewrite so you get the gist:

      I was so afraid of everyone thinking I was stupid, that I practiced my new language with our puppy–who I knew would not be judgemental and would be willing to listen! After immigrating to Canada, it’s true that I had the language skills after a two-year certification as a foreign language correspondent. While I could perform oral business translations, I did not dare to talk to people. During the full-time programme, the goal was perfection. The problem was that we never practiced improvised conversations interactively. So, that’s where my dog came in!

      • Thanks, Shannon, I see what you mean. I will see what I can do.

      • I’m wondering if you can also make a joke about the puppy’s conversation improving as well.

      • Second draft:

        When I immigrated to Canada, I had the language skills to thrive in my new country after a two-year certification as a foreign language correspondent. While I could confidently perform oral business translations, I did not dare to talk to people. During the full-time programme, the goal was perfection. However, we never practiced improvised conversations interactively.

        Once in Canada, I was afraid everyone would think I was stupid because I could not express myself to others with the subtleties of my mother tongue. I was so scared that I tried to convince my husband to be my voice outside the house. At the same time, I was annoyed with myself. I had been the head of a department. Did I suddenly want to hide behind my husband? My fighter character awoke, and I found my match in our new puppy, who was non-judgmental and eager for my company and also had lots to learn. While I needed to speak, she had to learn how to listen. The perfect combination! I became more comfortable, and she improved her ability to obey comments. She even learned some German in the process. The word “Pfui” meant she had to stop her action pronto. Soon I had my confidence back – and not only with my puppy. I started mingling with other newcomers to the city, most of them were Canadian, but they still had to get acquainted with the neighbourhood.

        I started working with private clients, which was exciting because I could individualize the learning material according to their needs and interests. I was more flexible and could pick when and where I worked. Unfortunately, I only had a small number of clients and spent a lot of time looking for new clients locally. Plus, situations changed due to travel, illness or family events, and I lost a client without much notice for a prolonged time. I still had to travel to the classes, hauling all my materials. So frustration slowly built again.

        I finally realized that I could share my passion with more people virtually. I have all my materials at hand. Plus, I save so much time. No more traffic jams and frantic searches for parking spots! No more worries about bad weather! These advantages also benefit the clients who can learn from everywhere in the world. A win-win!

        I help you learn German playfully and practically to feel confident when you communicate with German speakers, whether in your circle of family and friends or during your vacation. The person across from you doesn’t care if you use the correct word or grammar but how you connect. I invite you to my Learn German Through Art programme to start speaking German now. The purpose of learning a language is to communicate.

        As an immigrant, I know acquiring the language skills for communication is as crucial as knowing a country’s traditions and culture. It is my pleasure to share my knowledge with you to enable you to enjoy German art in its original language, whether you love reading books, watching movies, or listening to music.

        Learning a new language opens so many doors. You will be able to talk to native speakers without a translator and enjoy the culture and traditions of a country in the original language.

        Do you want your desire to learn German to stay a dream, or are you ready to take action NOW? Don’t feel like an outsider. Instead, become an engaged participant in conversations. Book a call with me now to discuss your path to successful learning.

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