BethShenton

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Would love any and all feedback on my direct offer post that would go into an email:

Hi ***,

Did you know that data driven businesses are 23 times more likely to acquire new customers and 19 times more likely to be profitable? Those are some staggering statistics folks, whether you love numbers or hate them. The evidence is clear that looking at…Read More

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11 Comments

Annette Presley
2 years, 6 months ago

I think it sounds great!
- DonnaDube
  2 years, 6 months ago
  
  Thanks Annette! I appreciate you taking the time to read it through.
SusanMaldonado
2 years, 6 months ago

Yes this is so good!!
- DonnaDube
  2 years, 6 months ago
  
  Thanks Sue! Appreciate it.
NancyChen
2 years, 6 months ago

Hi Donna, this is reading tight and strong; good work, Any ideas for a grabby TITLE?
- DonnaDube
  2 years, 6 months ago
  
  Thanks Nancy. For a title I was thinking “It’s time for profitable decision making in your business”
  - NancyChen
    2 years, 6 months ago
    
    Donna, I think that the arguments that you make so strongly to follow are too compelling, and almost demand, a hookier title. Let yourself get passionate about your topic, which you clearly are, and see what comes out :-D! ?How to make your numbers your best friend vs. your worst enemy? Stop sweeping the financial truth of your business under the…Read More
    - DonnaDube
      2 years, 6 months ago
      
      Nancy, thanks for your kind words.. love your suggestions.. I will have some fun with it and see what I can come up with. Titles are obviously not my strong point! On a side note, I would be happy to chat with you further if you wish, no need to wait till you hit $200K!
      - KerstinPeters
        2 years, 6 months ago
        
        Very clear and compelling, Donna. I have a similar problem with titles.
JoelElfman
2 years, 6 months ago

Donna, really good.
I would consider flipping “Are you ready to dump uncertain guesswork and start making profitable decisions in your business?, to “Are you ready to start making profitable decisions in your business, and dump uncertain guesswork?
And I would also consider, again switching the CTA around, “Book a call with me and let’s make…Read More
- DonnaDube
  2 years, 6 months ago
  
  Thanks Joel for your thoughts! I like your suggestions.

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